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True Stories to Make You Laugh

Gyda Kaland, 98, bought a new tractor for her farm in Norway. In keeping with Norwegian military policy, the elderly woman's name was put on the armed forces reserve list and she was instructed to report with the machine in case of a military emergency. Gyda told the newspaper in Bergen, Norway, that if the military "can use my tractor to defend the country, they can have it." She promised to "be there if they need me," but cautioned, "I'm not quite as frisky as I used to be."

A report in the journal Gut, published by the British Medical Association, warned golfers to stop licking their balls for luck. The report stated that weed killers used on golf course fairways can cause serious illness if ingested by licking golf balls. Turns out a 65-year-old duffer contracted hepatitis after he licked his ball at a course that used Agent Orange to kill weeds.

A newspaper reported that police in Orange County, California, pulled over a man for driving drunk. The cops were checking his license and testing his reflexes when their radio reported a robbery in progress a block away. The police told the man to wait and ran down the street to investigate the break in. The drunk got tired of waiting, jumped in the car and drove home. Later the police arrived at his house and searched his garage--where they found the car the man had mistakenly taken home--their police car. The lights were still flashing.



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